Man, I love Salem

So yesterday evening, about 4:00 a guy pulls in to the yard. I stand up and expect him to come into the office, but he didn't, so I went and sat back down in my office.

While looking out my winodow, I have a clear view of our bubbler rocks. Bubbles are big tall rocks with holes drilled in them fountains. Anyway, this guy is squatted down, with his arms wrapped around a rock that weighs about 1,000 lbs, he also had a dog loose, which is not allowed on our property, b/c insurance won't cover it. Afraid he was trying to lift the rock and would hurt himself, I called Dave (my manager) up to deal with this guy and his dog.

Dave goes out there and is keeping a pretty big distance between this guy (who is still wrapped around this rock) and himself. Dave comes in the office and asks me how much it is, then heads back out.

Dave: It's 275.

Guy: Two dollars and seventy-five cents?

Dave: No, Two hundred and seventy-frive dollars.

Guy: Well that's not what you're going to give it to me for, right?

Dave: No, I'll give it to you if you pay me $275

Guy: How did you get this rock?

Dave: On a truck

Guy: No, I mean how did you get it here?

Dave: Well, a truck brought it here from the quarry, I took a tractor, picked it up off the
truck and put it on the ground

Guy (very frustrated): No how? I've been with this rock before, in the Columbia River Gorge

Dave: No you haven't, this didn't come from the Gorge.

Guy: No, I have, I've been with this rock before. You must not know what's going on in
America , all you care about is money. I have the money to come get this rock and the
equipment too!

Dave (backing to the door): Okay sir, have a good day.

Guy: Oh is that how it's going to end?

Dave (walks in the door and locks it): fruit cake.

Come to find out when the guy was trying to pick up the rock, he was actually hugging it.

Only in Salem Folks. Only in Salem.